Yesterday I decided I would stop playing tourist and start doing the things I flew out here to do. First on the list was getting a Maryland bank account. Greg had gathered the names of the various banks and we had checked them out online. We narrowed it down to a couple. I went in bank #1 yesterday and explained I had questions about their checking accounts. I am led into the office of gal who probably made minimum wage.
Me: Do you charge for debit card usage?Home-girl: Debits cards are only given after you’ve “proven” yourself.
Me: “Proven” yourself? How does one “prove” their selves?Home-girl: You have to go at least 60 days without bouncing a check, and then we “may” consider giving you one.
Me: I haven’t bounced a check in at least 20 years. Isn’t there someway we can forgo the 60 days?
Home-girl: I don’t reckon so. I don’t know of no-body who was able to “prove” their selves before 60 days.
Me: How do you deposit your paychecks after hours then? And what about ATM usage? I just don’t know how I could survive without my ATM debit card.
Home-girl: Oh no, I wouldn’t use the ATM to deposit your check if I was you. It could take 3 or 4 days at least before your check would hit your account if you put it in the ATM. We don’t even check the ATM box everyday.
Me: ATM box? Isn’t it electronic? You mean you hand enter deposits?
Home-girl: We have to verify them before we deposit them to your account. We can’t take your word that the check is good.
Me: Even a weekly payroll check?
Home-girl: Especially a payroll check.
Me: What about free checking?” Do you have that?
Home-girl: Oh it’s not free; you have to deposit a minimum of $50 to open a checking account.
Me: I understand minimum deposits, but are any service fees associated with your checking accounts?
Home-girl: Yes, you have to have a minimum deposit of $50 to open a checking account.
Me: AAGGHHHHH!!!
It's comforting (?) to learn that banks/tellers are the same in the East as they are in the Midwest LOL